Infatuation

My wife made a comment to me tonight that made me think about some things - she tends to do that!!  We were having a family night out at a favorite restaurant - El Erradero - when I guess she saw me looking at her, and she commented, "Are you in one of your infatuation periods again?"  It struck me because it is a topic that comes up often in our marriage.  I have professed forever that I have never lost that sense of infatuation for her - she tends to lean in the direction of the words her mother said to her many years ago, "You must choose to love when the infatuation ends."  I never liked the thought of that, and I guess it's not something that I want to consider having an ending.

I guess it's a testament to the downward spiral that our society has taken.  Our society doesn't respect the place of marriage, family, and true love anymore.  It is as if true love is strictly left to fairy tales.  I guess I'm lucky in that I know I have my true love in my life, and I guess it's hard to watch and listen to those who espouse that it's ok to experiment with love, it's ok to get married even if you're not certain and use divorce as a get out of jail free card.  Is it too much to ask that people respect the institution for what it truly is - a commitment, a journey, a joy?  (By the way, this is not a discussion about the institution of marriage and gay rights - I beleive that many gay people probably respect marriage more than heterosexuals, anyway!)

I see so many of my students today who struggle to get any affection at home, and I think it's because the parents themselves aren't showing eachother that affection.  Love is contagious, especially in a home.  I know that my wife and I are not afraid to show our affection in our house, and I think that it's a benefit to our children.  They know how much we love eachother, and they know that we love them all just as much.  You wouldn't believe how many students in my class just want a hug - even the boys!! 

Family values gets a bad rap nowadays due to the fact that it is so engrained in the rhetoric of the Christian conservatives.  I don't claim to support all sides of the CC's, but is it so bad that we live up to a standard that says love one another, respect one another, give yourself to eachother and to your children?  Are those such bad things?  I don't think so, and I can't imagine many saying the contrary, yet we see it every day when men ogle at girls in advertisements or watch a show on TV because it has someone in it who might take off his shirt and show off his abs - yes, I'm talking to those of you who watch Grey's Anatomy - admit it, why else do you call them McSteamy and McDreamy?  Those are the standards you set for yourselves! 

Infatuation for me isn't a choice - I'm addicted to my wife, and she's stuck with me.  I just wish that others could enjoy the amazing feeling that I have knowing that I've found my true love.  Perhaps if people spent a little more time respecting it and appreciating what it can do for them, they wouldn't dare take it for granted. Maybe they too couldn't help but stare at their spouse at the dinner table despite how obvious it is that they can't take their eyes off of them.  Maybe their kids would see it and know how wonderful and powerful it really is!!